The Last one Yr!
I don’t know where to start cuz so many different iamges of different hues flash in front of me when I start thinking about the last eventful year in my life! The post, of course I started writing to mark the completion of one yr of my wedded life, but there were more changes in life than just the title of being a wife to someone. So lemme start from where my memories privilege me :)
I don’t know where to start cuz so many different iamges of different hues flash in front of me when I start thinking about the last eventful year in my life! The post, of course I started writing to mark the completion of one yr of my wedded life, but there were more changes in life than just the title of being a wife to someone. So lemme start from where my memories privilege me :)
When my spinster days were on the verge of getting over, I still dint come to the realization that a big change was gonna happen in my life. Since I had spoken to my fiance for quite a while, I just dint see any big change coming my way cuz I thought I already knew all that was ever there to know. But as they say you might never know the person even after having spent a lifetime with him/her under the same roof :) I dunno how much that is true but ya the art of actually "Knowing" your husband definitely takes time!! You can never be sure that you know "Everything" about someone cuz you have spoken to each other for long or spent time with each other or etc etc.
And marriage definitely brings a multitude of changes in the way u even think about issues in life. People always say that one is constantly learning thru out his/her life. We all cant deny that we all learn from our past experiences, be it with friendships, work mates, work life, life away from family etc etc. And wenever we look back at all the memories we sometimes laugh thinking how silly we were and sometime feel proud thinking how much we have grown and matured thru it all! It happens to everyone and as i am trying to turn the pages of this most recent and first year of my married life...i have varied memories. I dint really imagine before marriage that i would have to live away from my husband for even one day! During my spinster days i was clear in my thinking and knew what i wanted and what i needed to do. But as soon as you are married there are strings attached to even your thoughts. When before marriage i thought living away from husband was not even in the book of thoughts...it actually came to happen to me. And though not very happy about it...i still ended up staying away from hubby for more than 4 months. Those were the MOST difficult days of my life! I really dont even want to remember those days. I had stayed away from family quite sometime of my life but staying away from husband was one of the toughest things i had to put up with in my life! There were of course practical reasons for taking that decision but i am so happy that those days are over. And that brings me to the FIRST lesson i learnt in the last year. NEVER EVER FOR ANY REASON TAKE A DECISION OF STAYING AWAY FROM SPOUSE EVEN IF THE REASONS MIGHT SOUND VERY PRACTICAL AND VERY WORKABLE!
Hmm..so finally after all the distance and time..when we actually started living together, it was like my long awaited dream come true! I had always been homely in my outlook and wanted very simple things from my marriage. The only accomplishment i wanted from my marriage was to make my husband dear HAPPY no matter what. But though that sounds very simple and easy, its not that easy a job to accomplish. To make someone truly happy you've gotto really understand that person and then only can you know what makes him/her happy or sad or angry or excited etc etc. And this journey of understanding definitely takes time :) And i must say, even if you are completely aware of what can annoy or irritate a person, it definitely takes a lot of patience...NOT to do that same thing!!! :) Aww c'mon the wife is also a human and has her own likes and dislikes and opinions and issues...and when sometimes she does lose her patient nerve...its only fair!! :) It has been an interesting journey to know and understand my husband...and even if i cant really claim that i know him completely but atleast i am happy that the journey is still ON and going great!! :)
Friends and Chats: While i was a spinster there were very few topics of interest that we spoke to almost all the friends. Most of the friendships i made came easy in those days...project mates...class mates...hostel/PG mates...Blogger friends etc etc. Every other person we met ended up in the friend list on orkut or facebook...and that was fun. Parents ofcourse were always worried about marriage matters but all that mattered to me and my friends was...have fun "At the MOMENT". Life was easy and FUN! Not that life is not FUN anymore...but that was a different phase and this is a different phase. Most of the chats i used to have with friends were driven with the same effort...of understanding the opposite sex!! While it was great to know that someone in your team had a crush on you...sometimes it just didnt matter. The things that mattered in those days were so different than the things that metter now. While the effort still remains the same...understanding the opposite sex...it shrinks to understanding just one person...your spouse. Just yesterday while talking to one of the friends over phone we were reminding each other of what we used to speak before marriage and what we speak now...while the topics have changed...the older subjects of discussion kind of seem silly and funy in some sense. How much we have changed or matured over time...and still theres so much more yet to come! And while theres so much more yet to come...i am happy and excited to share each and every of it with my husband dear! I guess the first step in starting to enjoy marriage is to start a lifelong friendship with your spouse...it doesnt start easy like it used to before marriage...and it does take a lot of effort and understanding. But most important of all...it takes a lot of trust. Trust builds up in time...and am hoping that this first year of my marriage has brought me one step closer to conquering my husband's trust!
I have had a wonderful first year...with some experiences that every married woman has had...and some which very few have had...and am happy to have gone thru whatever i had to...am so happy to be married to my husband...and to spend my lifetime with him...to share my dreams and to be a part of his dreams...to slowly understand him step by step...to start loving him more and more with each passing day...this one year journey hopefuly brings me one step closer to conquering my destination...to become his "Better Half" :)
1 comments:
Truely , very truely you bought me tears. If there is a place on this earth where there is no one, i pull the moon close add stars to the sky, make the sea to blow gentle breeze. I'll old your hands and shout to the heaven and earth "This is My WIFE".
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