This book, which i had once deserted branding it as a "Boring" book, turned out to be one more of the good books i've read of Nicholas Sparks. The book narrates the story of Wilson, a responsible man, who is married to Jane for 30 years. Wilson has not been much of a Romantic person ever while Jane on the other hand hails high expectations of a romantic life. Her parents had been true romantics in their lives and she believes in long term and lasting relationships filled with love and romance as her parents lives sets an example for her. Wilson had always leaned more on the practical side of life...viewing and prioritising things on the basis of needs while Jane had always had a carefree attitude towards important issues in Life. The story starts with Wilson forgetting his and Jane's 29th Wedding Anniversary. This upsets Jane much and constrains different kind of thoughts in Wilson which he hadnt perceived ever in his life. He doesnt realise forgetting an anniversary as something big until Jane's behaviour urges him to believe that things were not normal! Jane leaves him to stay with their son, who stays in New York, for a couple of weeks. This gives enough time to Wilson to think about his relationship with his wife whom he had loved all his life. He realises how different he and Jane have been as individuals...while he had been more responsible towards his work and earning money for his family, Jane had been the more social member of the family. Jane was the one staying at home and taking care of their 3 kids, socialising with the friends and relatives, putting up with the household chores, cooking cleaning etc making their house more of a home! He realises that she has always been smart and has always thought through the important issues in life...and still she had been able to keep a carefree attitude towards crucial things and enjoyed the small joys of life, while he had just been too busy with his work at the law firm never having time or interest in enjoying the small things that make life worthwhile. He starts to wonder why she ever married him at the first place? He finds himself feeling inferior to her in the numerous things in life which make a difference. He realises that in his pursuit of being successful at his work and earning enough money for his family, he had actually neglected his family in the numerous small things that matter the most. He was always absent in most of his children's special events like their dance at school or their sports finale or their parents teachers association meetings. He missed out on so many of their small joys like the first time they started talking or they started walking etc. He wonders if his family especially his wife still loves him and considers him a part of their life...he is unable to decipher if he is as important in their lives as they are in his life! He realises his delinquency and sets out on correcting himself, on becoming the man that his family needs...more exactly, on becoming the man that his wife fell in love with 29 years ago!
The story is beautifully written with all the intricate details narrated carefully and realistically. There is hardly any point in the whole book where you will feel that it is dragging. I got impressed with the Prologue of the book itself, about which i already blogged a post. The minute details which had been considered while narrating Wilson's endeavors in correcting his wrongs enhance the book's closeness to the life's realities that all couples experience. Wilson gets his inspiration and motivation on correcting his married life from his father-in-law Noah Calhoun, who had been a true romantic in his life. Noah makes Wilson understand why the small things in life are so important, why it is so important to show love to your dear ones even if they know that you love them. Wilson finally conquers to know what Togetherness really is, when all the years of staying together in the same house with his wife, hadnt taught him that.
To me the book is a nicely written and "easy to relate to real life" kind of book with some excerpts urging you to think about the intricacies of married relationships. I wouldnt rate this book as something too emotional like Nicholas' other books, but it definitely is a good book. While reading the book, it did not really seem like i was reading a story, all the events felt like happenings from a real life. For someone who enjoys reading light hearted and more practical books, this is a good choice. I was impressed with the climax of the story much, as i was definitely not expecting so much of a change from Wilson. The author finally answers the question he asks in the prologue. The book will leave the reader with a "feel good" kind of feeling as it has a happy ending unlike a couple of Nicholas Sparks books that i have read in the past. The Nicholas magic reflects in every aspect of the book, if it wasnt for him and his profoundly amazing writing, the story could have turned out boring and predictable.
Nutshell: Amazing author, Good read!
After all the hype given to this one...i just HAD to watch it! First i heard it from my friends here that the songs are Stupendo Fantabulastic!! Then there were others who said that the movie is cute...and then some days back i read a post from one of my friends hyping the movie to greater heights!! And i knew i had to give it a shot this weekend... :)
The movie's story i will say is something different...something that atleast i would not call as being predictable. The story is something very close to reality...the kind of ups and downs that love stories these days go thru...the way emotions have been depicted is very realistic and will keep you glued to your seats. The story though being different doesnt take you into a fantasy world where you will say such things dont happen in real life!! it keeps itself carefully within the limits of realities of today's world. The delicate strings that carry a relatioship thru sweet times and hard times have been beautifully depicted in the movie. I would not rate this movie as one which is very emotional...but yess i would definitely call this one as being close to reality and real world...no bekaar ka rona dhona...
The title of the movie Vinnaithaandi Varuvaya actually carries a much unfathomable thought!! Vinnaithaandi Varuvaya which translates to "Will you cross the Skies and Come". For someone who is in love nothing other than the love for his/her lover matters! The story in the movie depicts how much importance love has in both Karthik and Jessie's lives. I am not here to crack the ending/story of the movie but by the end, the movie does leave everyone with this lingering thought. The movie shows the paths taken by Krthik and Jessie as something that very truly happens in real life. but the thought still lingers...Is there Love still in this world so true? so committed? having no strings attached to it? Are there still people who leave their skies (the lives they live, their families, their comforts, their relationships, their religion etc etc) and come for their love?
The thought provoking storyline of the movie is aptly teamed up with some really beautiful locations in the movie. The locations where the film has been shot are absolutely eluding...the nice play of the right lights and right background music over the beauty of the locations creates an overwhelming aura while watching the movie...it does take you to a near magical trip...esp the locales in Kerala are really breathtaking...and even NewYork looks exceptionally beautiful for the little part in the movie. I particulary like Jessie's house in Kerala and the way to her house...its so romantic...getting there in a boat...walking the lush green path towards the house...and the way the house is decorated on her wedding day is just too dreamy...it looks like the ultimately romantic house anyone would love to spend their life in!! i was glued to my seat entwining a story of my own...i could feel it as a story that many people in todays world will relate to!
Music of the film is superb...A R Rahman scores a big one for this movie..definitely from me he does! The Title song is rendering one...and one of my fave ones...its gonna be difficult to choose any ONE as the best song from the movie...but i personally like the title song then Omana Penne and then Hosanna and then Anbil Avan and Kannukkul Kannai (In that order). But i guess the best song from the movie for me will have to be Mannippaya. This song i guess is something thats the crux of the whole movie...amazingly done by Rahman. I did hear the songs of Vinnaithaandi Varuvaya before also when my friends had hyped the music so much...but now after watching the movie theres a little more sweetness qoutient added to the songs!
I enjoyed watching the movie thoroughly and i am happy that i did watch this one...i wont call this as one great movie but i definitely did like the movie...and would call it as one of the few GOOD Tamil movies that i have watched till now.. :)
Did you ever hear that a voice can cast a spell!?
It was a normal work day of the week, i was travelling in the peak hour crowded Path train to WTC train station...my head and mind were immersed into the Nicholas Sparks book that i am reading these days...the train was approaching Exchange Place Station...my ears were tuned to the usual songs i hear everyday...i usually keep the volume less so that i can keep my whole concentration on what i am reading and dont wonder my thoughts to any nostalgic emotions...given the normal "ME" that i am...i would love listening to music and observing the people in the train...or watch each and every scene that passes by me on the way to my office...But these days i am in a phase of transforming myself into developing more serious and less fantasy highlighted habits!! So i was seriously reading this story that i have developed much interest in reading these days....and however interesting things might be going on around me in the train i would just dig my head inside the book that i am reading being just not bothered about whatevers happening...and suddenly there was this one voice that made me absolutely stunned...as if taking me to a different world even while i was reading the book that interested me alot!! I felt as if it was casting a spell on me urging me to listen to it and to just concentrate on it and not on anything else...as if hypnotising me to be attracted towards itself...i gave myself into the magnetic pull of the voice and turned the volume to the max i could....i closed the book which was keeping me so glued to itself till then...i closed my eyes and immersed myself into the little magical moment that was created...after a little while i opened my eyes and observed the huge crowd in the train that i had not been noticing all the while...i opened the music player to see what song it was...it was a song called Tu Jaane Na from the movie Ajab Prem Ki Gajab Kahani...and the singer, Atif Aslam...My immediate thought was...Did someone say a voice can cast a spell on you?? That was the first time i felt that there is something called Magical Voice. When all this while people used to say that someone's got a magical voice...it never did really strike me that magical has this much of an effect...Atif's voice definitely has cast a spell on me...and i guess i dont have the right words to express what it makes me feel like!!
Magical... :)
Cooking!! ME??
yess...thats one of my newly found passions...not only these days but ever since i started cooking i have become a fan of it myself...i LOVE trying out new things...thats in my "Character"...i love experimenting...and in a phase where i am transforming my life for the better...or may be in an attempt to treat myself better i have finally been taking time off to do things which i always wanted to do!! One of the many such relaxing and treating myself right things which i enjoy doing is: Cooking. I always wanted to cook good...but may be i lacked practice...or patience...or may be the tv seemed a more relaxing option whenever there was free time. Since the time i moved into a new house in Chennai in Sep'08...i have been trying my hand at cooking but it was not until i reached the US of A that i started serious cooking and serious experimenting! Most of the time that i was in Chennai i cooked the usual subzi, bhaji, dal and chawal things but since the time i moved to US i have been cooking what all and what not! Thanks to the internet...my most sincere source of motivation...i have been learning some good recipes...trying out at home...and finally have been able to impoverish myself so much that i can say that cooking takes practice! and i am happy that even if i was more enthu when i started cooking first but now i am more practical about it. I learnt some real unique recipes from some of my friends here and i am happy that i learnt such unusual ways of cooking some boring veggies cuz otherwise i would have never even thought of eating any of those. Well thats what i like right now...i learn unusual (But tsaty) ways of cooking the otherwise boring vegetables so that these can also be eaten with pleasure rather making faces! Thats exactly what i am at these days...and i am absolutely enjoying it. i am happy that now i know enough (though not many) nice recipes that i can start blogging about it...or just start being happy that atleast a whole month of stay in my home will not make anyone get bored of food...atleast!
One more thing i have been trying to do is to compile a really captivating recipe archive for myself...to be treasured. I have so many ideas about it but i just havent been able to do it...not having time enough will again not be the right thing to say...so i will stick to saying I have to start taking time off for my special compilation. :)
This post is just a prelusive for all so that you dont get shocked if i actually start posting some recipes here...though i will think a hundred (prolly more than a hundred) times before posting anything here!
Prologue: The Wedding
Is it possible, I wonder, for a man to truly change? Or do Character and Habit form the immovable boundaries of our lives?
I am not gonna ask each and every person i meet to comment on the question that attracted me to the book but i surely do wanna know THE answer to this question. I was talking to one of my friends about these things and he said yes people do change!! He gave me examples about how much he has changed...how much his dad has changed etc etc. Fair enough...may be people change...but i feel what actually changes in a person is just his behaviour and habits...and may be point of view!
Character i feel is a more rigid concept and often cannot be changed! Lemme quote something from what my "Character" is. As i remember myself as and what i know i am...i am the kind of person who has always been more of a people oriented person. More involved in building relationships, making people feel comfortable in my company, having fun and most of all just getting away from any kind of things that can make me tensed. To me what another person thnks about me is kind of a very important thing. Its easy to make me cry as i get hurt easily. But at teh same time its easy to make me laugh also...even small joys can give me alot of happiness. I love to laugh and be completely care free about the major things/issues in life! I have always been the homely kind...decorating home, learning something creative, making artifacts etc etc. I have loved music forever...i always wanted to be able to play some instrument or the other...especially guitar...to sing well...to listen to music whenever i get time.
Well thats a little peep into my Character and may be my hobbies...which are again an extension of my character. Over the years when i have lived far from my family, when i had people around me bitching and backbiting, when i have faced politicts at work place to personal life, when i have seen some really difficult times to some really good and enjoyable times...i guess i have seen and learnt alot. Well everyone learns from experience and so have I. And i know after learning so many things in life...your attitude towards numerous things changes. For ex: when i first started working i used to love my work and respect my managers and use to be happy doing that. I was satisfied with whatever i was doing and never thought that there will be a change to that life...with my manager having a good rapport with me and me enjoying everyday at my work place...i never thought that if a bad time comes no one will think of the good times that we shared...or if i was a good person or not...that i will be dumped out of project cuz of insufficient billing etc etc. I never realised that it was just a job...not a personal thing. As time passed and i worked under different managers and different kind of projects i learnt different realities of work life. And now i have learnt how to handle my work...i know how much priority to be given for what. So i can say...my attitude has changed (Thats still not my character that changed).
Similarly it might happen that i have a point of view about something cuz i am not completely aware of that thing. Some day in my life i learn more about it and that day i realise that what i had been thinking about it all this while was actually wrong. So my point of view changes (Its still not your character that changed).
Similarly say you stay in a place like Adyar, Chennai. Now you have a newspaper mart about 100 feet from your house and you love looking for sales around the city everyday which you get to see in the newspaper. So you started picking the newspaper on the way to office everyday and while you were just interested in looking for sales you kind of started observing the headlines and reading some other news in the paper as well. Finally after a few days it became a habit for you 2 start your day with reading the newspaper on the way commuting to your office everyday. You enjoyed doing that and i guess it became your habit and hobby both. Now you had a change of office or place etc. You dont have any newspaper mart close to the new place of stay. For the first few days you try getting a newspaper cuz you try going out of your way and getting a newspaper. But gradually you stop doing that and find other ways of keeping yourself entertained like may be listening to music on your way commuting to the new office etc. So i guess your hobby/habit changed (Not your character). Now you enjoy listening to music more than reading the newspaper. Not that you will not read a newspaper if you got a chance to do that but right now that is not the priority in your list of things to do for the day.
Similarly your likings and dislikings can change. Say for example that you liked a particular sandwich in your office alot. You liked it because may be it was really good or may be because it was the only breakfast you could have in office thatw as decent enough. Not that there are no better sandwiches in the whole of world. You move to a newer office and start liking another sandwich here...may be cuz it tastes better that the previous one or may be because its the only thing available for you. All i am trying to say is that as per the circumstances your likings might (or might not) change. It might have happened initially that you dont like sandwches at all...you would rather have cornflakes for breakfast...but you couldnt have it then cuz of circumstances you started liking the sandwiches. Its just that your liking to a particular thing is very vulnerable to your surroundings and circumstances. But at most times, not actually your character.
Like for me...if i say my current likings/hobbies are...cooking, knitting, reading (which i never was good at), walking (which always made me tired in the past), Photography (which is one of my newly found passions)...i can very confidently say that most of these things were not my likings before...even if they always existed burried inside my character sometime...while some of your likings are very vulnerable to your surroundings...some others are just too deeply rooted in your inner character to be removed or changed.
The Dictionary defines Character as The aggregate of features and traits that form the individual nature of some person or thing. It defines Habit as An acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary. Thats exactly what i was trying to accomplish through my contemplation. Character I feel is something so deeply rooted that its hard to change and often does not change while Habit on the other hand is very vulnerable to our environment and circumstances and hence more succeptible to change. To answer the author's question i would say that yes Character and Habit do form immovable boundaries in our lives but not totally immovable while some Habits do change, some are just too deep rooted to our individual character to change.
Of course Change is t he wheeler-dealer who propels the world to its existence and hence even my opinion about Character might change sometime, but as of now these are my thoughts, my conclusion after my contemplation journey.
YEs its the International Women's Day...actually it was yesterday but given my busy schedule at office these days i hardly find time to finish my postings regularly!! As i wrote in my earlier pos...there are so many things i wanna do in my day that i just dont find time enough for everything...i want to finish reading so many books...i want to learn so many new things bla bla etc..etc.. Yesterday being the International Women's Day did not make much difference to me...but i was happy that there are a few things like this to commemorate the greatness of women!! They definitely are a special creation of the almighty and a day dedicated to celebrate women and their umpteen great things...that feels good.. :)
I usually dont consider any of these days as anything special...except for Mothers and Father's Day...though i had always wanted 2 celebrate Valentine's day as specially as i could...but unfortunately i never had a valentine on valentines.. :) and this year when i had someone special...well i was still not able to do that...given the continents and oceans between us...we did send each other gifts...but gifts will never really replace a person's presence!! Anyways let me not deviate from what i am trying to post here...so i never considered Women's day as anything special...though i used to wish my colleagues at work and some of my friends thru mail etc etc...but i never really took time to celebrate it as such!
8th March'2010...It was a hard monday at work...mondays usually are the hardest days of the week...was a hectic day with no time to think about anything...and though i usually always want to leave for home by 4:50....most of the days i end up staying till after 5:30...I finished the work for the day...and started preparing myself to leave office...i was putting on my coat when i realised...i did put my left arm inside the coat first...actually long back one of my friends had read this somewhere that women usually always use their left arm first whenever wearing a dress or blouse or sweater or coat etc while men always use their right...and jus then the thought crossed my mind...its actually Women's Day today!! whew...i dint even realise that it was Women's Day...usually in india i would hav gotten mails from my colleagues at work wishing me a Happy Women's Day etc...but here i hardly get any forwards from my friends in India...Anyways...does it even make a difference? I put on my walking shoes...Checked my desk...picked up my id card and my train tickets which i keep in a plastic case...i rechecked my desk to make sure i dint leave anything important...and i started walking towards the lift...i checked the time in the small tv display inside the lift and felt it was late for me...it was 5:27 pm...i just thought to myself i should start rushing towards the path station...only then i will be able to catch the earliest possible path train to Newark Penn and then atleast catch the 6:02 or the 6:12 NJTransit train from Newark Penn Station...if i miss the 6:12 train...then i hav 2 wait nearly 30 mins for the next one...and i definitely dint want 2 do that after such a tiring day at work. I put my earphones on and started listening to the usual songs on my mobile...the song on the list was dil tho bacha hai ji...one of my faves...i knew i was hurrying up to the WTC path Station and while walking towards the station...all i could think of was...man i need 2 reach there soon...i don wanna miss the last express train to Edison...i was approaching the Vessey street junction where i take a turn everyday to reach the path station...and just then something struck me...its WOMEN's Day...let me go and do something good for myself...i've worked hard and achieved much in life and i should give myself a break...give myself a pat on the back...i should do something for myself also...something that will make me happy...i have forgotten shopping for myself since ages i guess...i did shop in NYC very often...but it was more for others...ya i did SHOP for a wedding dress in the whole of NY/NJ...that was crazzzzy...but that was a necessity...not actually the joy of "SHOPPING" :)
With all the winter clearance Sales going on thru out NYC, i thought i should just go and grab something for myself that will make me happy...though i never did find anything at all in my size in the whole of all places i visited in US till now...and that too in a clearance sale!! Well the chances were less than faint...but i jus wanted to do something that will make me happy...i was still walking to the junction...finally i dint take the turn...i was not thinking anything just listening to the song on my mobile and i found myself not even looking at my watch to check the time...i was heading towards church street...and i knew i will jus go and have a good time for myself...something i totally deserve...atleast on Women's Day!!
So i landed at Century 21...one of the most famous Fashion Stores in NYC...and started checking stuff for myself...i knew i will finally come out all sad that there was nothing in my size...and whatever scarce was there...of course i couldn't like...i was jus thinking when suddenly i figured out where the petite section was...i was kind of happy thinking that i will finally find something here which i mite like...and good Gracious!! i found something that looks like its gonna fit me!! It was an aqua coloured shirt...i liked the cut and the shape...i wasnt very impressed with the colour though... but i was too happy to know that i found something i liked in my size!! i picked it immediately and started walking to the fitting area...on the way i picked up a couple of things that i liked which i was not sure will fit me like i wanted...finally i was waiting in the queue for fitting room...and when i tried the shirt i was happy with the way it fitted me!! i tried the other things that i had picked up from the petite section...and finally had brains enough to check the price on each of them.. :) the shirt that i had liked so much..costed 30 Dollars!! it was pretty expensive for a shirt...but i guess i was too happy to have found something that fitted me...and i dint mind the cost...i just dropped everything else that i had picked up thinking that its better to pick one expensive piece that fits you well than to pick 5 cheap pieces that dont fit you so well!! anyways...being happy with my decision i started walking towards the billing area hoping to find something more that will fit me...and i found something again in my size which was more expensive than the shirt i just chose...but was something i wanted for a long long time!! i dont really know what was gotten into me!! if it was the normal me...i would have dropped both the things and would have walked off...but then today i was in some different spirits...i had made up my mind to spend for MYSELF...so i picked the second peice also...and finally got it billed...the bill was a whooping 75 Dollars for a shirt and a sweater...but i felt it was worth it...i definitely did deserve this!!
I walked back to the WTC Station being a happy ME...i was happy and not even bothered what time i was gonna get the next train to Edison from Newark Penn...i was jus happy! I usually dont read the AM NewYork newpaper these days...but that day i picked it up from the WTC Station and started reading it...and just as i used to do before...i hunted to find the zodiac section...was excited to read what was in store for me that day!! This usually happens to me...i suddenly become very happy when i buy something that i like...everything starts looking good and i am in high spirits...anywyas...being in high spirits i started reading out the Virgo: Your Day Today column...and i was surprised to see what i read...it said " Today circumstances will allow you to direct your passions into growing your beauty"...I dont believe in daily horoscopes but still read them whenever i get a chance...and i had to agree that it was a good day and i did do something good for myself on that day.
So this Women's day embarks a start of new celebrations for me...the start of celebrating my womanhood...celebrating Myself. We as women need to realise that though women have been created to be more patient, more submissive, more enduring...though they are by nature are more generous and have a tendancy to think for others before themselves...it is good to treat ourselves better atleast on some special days! When the whole world unites to commemorate a day meant just for women...we should take full advantage of such an occasion and do things just for us...just for making us happy!! I am not saying that everyone should indulge in reckless shopping like me...but it can be anything just anything that makes you happy! Its a great thing to be a Woman and giving yourself a gift for Womanhood on your special day is definitely totally worth it.. :)
